Home again, home again jigety jig…..

Only those of you of a certain age will know the rest of that rhyme … I’m sure it would be totally unacceptable now, along with the majority of all the nursery rhymes I was brought up with. Here’s a thought, maybe I too have become unacceptable – where would that leave us ? A thought for another day I feel, otherwise I’ll never tell you about our recent escapades which is what I set out to do!

Not to confuse you Dear Reader, but we aren’t “there” any more but back here into the arms of Grandma…

Thanks to Grandma ( and probably more importantly our lovely friends next door) our house was safe, sound and warm on our return! Return indeed we did after a long journey … the purpose of this blog ! Those of you who follow me will probably know that we spend time in Spain at different times of the year, and it is from there that we travelled ! You will also know we travel with this young lady too…

I have written previously about trips to the vet with her, both in Spain and in the UK! Well our last visit to the Spanish vet did not disappoint you’ll be pleased to hear! We have to go every time prior to our departure from Spain in preparation for our entry into the UK for a health check and for tapeworm treatment ! So we arrive at the vets at the appointed time where a young vet is waiting … “Elizabeth”? he calls. Yes that’s us ! ( Don’t be alarmed Dear Reader , I haven’t changed my name by deed poll or otherwise) In Spain I’m known as Harding Elizabeth Jane ….don’t ask! Just know I’ll answer to anything ….so Elizabeth and Millie hurry forth . Now I should have realised as I passed through reception and saw one of the senior vets in “ scrubs” and with a bright light on his head ( you know the sort of thing you see in the television programme “Surgeons at the Edge of Life” – to clarify it’s not the surgeon that is at the edge of life , it is one of his patients…) … some kind of surgery was in process ! However what I didn’t appreciate was that the surgery was happening in the consulting room where we were led ! No of course I didn’t see blood and guts – why ? because a roller blind ( yes, you heard correctly) was pulled down between the two metal consulting tables ! I did see however, numerous instruments that had clearly been used for whatever procedure was underway !

So there we are in what can only be described as an operating theatre – and seemingly oblivious to what was going on around us and without explanation, the young vet asked about Millie’s general health, carried out a physical examination and dished out three tablets to be consumed . It always amazes me that they are surprised she wolfs each tablet with relish …..she’s a golden retriever for goodness sake, they eat fox poo and worse! Three deliciously flavoured bone shaped tablets are a complete and utter treat! Anyway with that we say goodbye and see you next time ( well adios , hasta la proxima to be precise) and off we toddle to prepare for our early start the next day!

Our journey was to be a long one – from south of Valencia to Calais and onwards via the tunnel to ‘ up North’ in the UK . The first leg was to Avignon in France and we set off at 0700 hours ( I of course was up a good hour before to ensure everything was closed up, packed up and ready to go … the DB doesn’t excel in the early mornings .. enough said) Now I don’t know about you but I am very lucky and have bowels that work like clockwork. No – indeed they are a clock and just like Millie knows when it is five o’clock and time for her tea, my bowels know that it is eight o’clock and time to go to work. However they have clearly joined a Union and a militant one at that! We’re not having our routine disturbed just because you need to travel along way. Normal service will only be resumed when you acknowledge we are entitled to a routine. So, not only do we have a long journey to undertake but I am dealing with petulant and sulking bowels … enough said !

During this part of the journey I did think about our reluctance to even mention our bowels and this in turn made me think of this wonderful woman…

This amazing lady raised the profile of bowels and bowel cancer after her own diagnosis of bowel cancer . She has left behind an amazing legacy. Sadly we have two friends with this disease at various stages so here follows a customer service broadcast to remind everyone what to be aware of …

I remember a spacial friend talking to us when we phoned her to say Happy 60 th Birthday! She commented on presents given to friends for their respective 60 th birthdays … you know the sort of thing , a weekend in New York, a diamond bracelet etc etc. Her commentas classic “ And all I get is a s**t kit posted through the door!” We are fortunate here in the UK to be offered bowel cancer screening at the age of 60, but I would urge anyone reading this to raise this with friends and family. Early diagnosis is key to successful treatment . Anyway that’s enough of the serious stuff ….sorry, what was that? Oh my bowels – easily bribed like a small child or Millie for that matter, with delicious treats! In my case, a good healthy meal !!!

Next day was onwards to Bethune … we were travelling on a Saturday so the motorways we’re not busy . We came upon a sign indicating that the inside lane of the motorway was closed one kilometre ahead .As we approached we saw a mobile sign .. you know the sort, powered by it’s own motor … but what it said completely stunned us .. “ERRANT ANIMAL” Before we had chance to even wonder what sort of an errant animal, we saw approximately twenty individuals dressed from head to toe in bright orange and standing about 2 metres apart, with rifles raised pointing away from the road towards the banking ! Clearly the “errant animal” was a feared beast but I am sorry to say Dear Reader we have no idea what exactly it was ! However our imagination ran riot as you can imagine! Only in France!!!! I can’t see that happening on the M1 between Sheffield and Barnsley !!!!!

Anyway we arrived home safely .. to very cold weather!

So now it is countdown to Christmas …ah! no countdown to surgery to repair my fractured and well socially distanced collarbone ! At least following surgery, I will be able to use my right hand so will be able to regale you with the highlights ( and possibly low lights) of the whole process!

I’ll leave you with these two lovelies…